Hey guys, I apologise for the lack of consistency. Me and blogger are not the best of friends right now but yeah here is the next blog. In moments of introspection, I've realised that if you don't know who you its is very easy for others to walk all over you and to take advantage. No matter how strong you fool people you are and no matter how many times you tweet that you're heartless, someone out there will find a way of walking all over you. S ociety, in general, wants us to be nice people. When we’re young, we’re often reminded why it’s a bad idea to be too stingy, too aggressive, too mean, or too arrogant. Unfortunately, society generally doesn’t remind us that being too nice can be just as bad, if not worse, than being mean. As a result, many of us have a hard time saying no when asking for a favour, and even more of us are ashamed to ever consider putting our own needs first. There are number of different ways to ensure you're not mistaken for a door matt.
Hi guys!
I wrote this blog after a situation took place in a restaurant which included two black males that felt the need to comment on their opinions of black women. Don’t get me wrong I truly believe in freedom of speech BUT only if the information coming from your lips is going to benefit someone. If the comments are only destructive and will only upset people there is no need for you to speak. His comments included things such as ‘black women have nothing to offer but pussy.’, ‘you are all destined to be single mothers’ and ‘the fact that you black women want to be independent is why you are so weak’.
First of all, I am a strong, compassionate, loving, intelligent, bright, socially aware, beautiful young black woman, who knows to value myself. I am more than just a sexual organ. I am my own muse filled with intellectual ideas and a serious interest in poetry and music and economics. So when I hear a male who was raised by a black woman and has younger sisters who are also black, degrade black women in such a way, I am actually brought to tears. All of those hours I put into perfecting my craft, all those hours that I put into reading to develop my understanding other topics all those hours I go to school in order to learn are translated into nothing and made worthless by an individual who doesn't know how hard it is to be a black woman in society, all my hard work. All my attributes are made to look like common characteristics due to the fact I have a vagina and my skin is not white. My theory on this guy is that he is so insecure and broken that he shifts all of his insecurities onto other people who have nothing to do with his issues and this is a slave mentality that will affect his future. Ignorance is bliss and this will follow this one individual for the rest of his life if he does not learn how to keep his invalid thoughts to himself. If black men hate black women how do they expect the rest of the world to love us?
The fact that for centuries black woman have been wrongly identified as failures and have been sexualised in society by all types of races is sad but the fact that a man who was raised by a black woman and who has sisters who are growing up in a society that hates them despite not knowing them just because they at black had the audacity to lift his lip and utter such ignorant and trash things makes me feel sick and brings me to tears. From slavery, black women have uplifted black men and tried to reverse the damage that scarred their brains and hit their mentality but then we want to be uplifted or even respected we are seen to be doing too much!
Someone brought up the point that maybe he was hurt by a black girl and that's why he feels like that. That is utter nonsense. I along with a number of other women of different races have been hurt by men and excluding the cheeky 'men are trash' comments, personally, I will never open my mouth to critics a whole race of men due to a bad experience that I have had with a couple of them. The fact that black women in this society uplift black men and sing their praises higher than any other group in society and are only met with hostility and resentment is truly disappointing.
People need to understand that I didn't choose to be black but even if I had the choice to be any race I wanted I would not change anything about my ethnicity. Being black is more than just a skin colour, it's a mentality. I learnt to love myself even when society didn't. When society was busy killing my fathers and my brothers instead of crying and postponing my productiveness, I rose above all negativity and used the drive that was murder out of my men and managed to use it as fuel; not to be average but to be a phenomenal example of woman for myself and to set an example for the younger generation of bright, beautiful black girls that are growing up in this society and have brothers that utter nonsense such as "black women at destined to be single mothers." I feel as if people look past positive connotations of black women such as #blackgirlsrock because they are afraid of the truth.
This is my message to this one individual who thought these comments were sensible.
I’m sorry you hate yourself. I am sorry your mother does not respect herself enough to educate her son on the intelligence and power that lies within the black female community. I am sorry that you do not respect yourself enough to find a girl that deserves to know you or does not give you enough emotional support. You are part of the problem. You are cancer that pollutes our society, the pollution that stops refreshing air from cleaning society. You are actually an antibody that refuses to die when antibiotics enter the body. I hope you find your peace. I hope that you find enough self-love in 2018 where you don’t need to bash beautiful queens such as myself and my friends because we don’t give you the time of day. Don’t be bitter sir, be better. Please give your sisters my number so I can undo all the negative energy you have fed into their souls.
HAPPY NEW YEAR AND HAVE A GOOD WEEK MY LOVELIES!
ASH X
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